Monday, November 12, 2012

Benefactor Needed: Apply within

There are days when you wish you were somebody else.  When the thought of working is enough to make you crawl under the rose bushes and hide.  The years of earning a salary and still having nothing to show for it are wearying.  I’ve worked in education for 26 years, my friend for 33 years.  That’s a couple of lifetimes.  The paperwork we’ve had to complete over those combined years would probably be enough to fill a few rooms.  We reckon we have done our time.
So joking around (as you do when you are wading through paperwork) we decided that what we really want in life is to stop working.  Unfortunately there is that little phrase  ‘no work no pay = no play’  that comes to mind.  Therein lies the rub.  We still want the same salaries.  Both being over fifty we are too old to move in to the playboy mansion.  We are still realistic.  Our marbles are still rattling in our skulls, we haven’t quite lost them yet.  The idea of starting a new career is too daunting.  We need a job where we can relax on a beach.

Therefore we decided that what we actually need is a rich benefactor.  It can be a man or a woman, we are not too fussy.  It would be preferable if we never have to see them or meet them, but they just top up our bank accounts each month.  Think of us as a car needing its petrol tank filled.  Obviously people just don’t hand out money for nothing.  You have to do something to earn it.  After serious discussion and deliberation we have agreed that we would be prepared to keep a photo of our benefactor in the drawer of the bedside cabinet.  That should be worth a few thousand dollars a month.
If you are interested in financing our lifestyles then please apply within.  You will not be required to attend any meetings, make any phone calls or complete any paperwork.

Cindy Vine is the author of Not Telling, The Case of Billy B, Defective and C U @ 8. You can buy her books on Amazon, Barnes and Noble and the Apple iStore.

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