Why I can't write

This seems to be the year of distractions.
I don't know what it is that some years you can achieve so much and other years it's just one distraction after another that blocks your vision, hampers your creativity and manages to force one's writing onto the back burner. 
I love writing.  Stories, relationship advice, I love it.  But this year it is a struggle and just isn't happening for me.
My youngest daughter will tell you, I'm addicted to research.  Mention something I don't know and I have an obsessive compulsion to find out all I can about it.  This means that my time on my laptop is ill-spent researching trivial bits and pieces that mean nothing to anybody just to satisfy some weird urge I have to acquire useless knowledge about random subjects.  It's a huge time-waster that I can't get control of.  An addiction I don't seem quite ready to give up.
During my recovery time after another bout with breast cancer, I should have been able to use that time to write.  Instead, I became completely obsessed with researching my roots.  I did find out some scandalous stuff but seriously, what can I actually do with that information?  How useful is it?  If I am honest with myself then it is just another waste of my time and time is very precious to me.

Being an armchair sports fanatic, a year of world cups is the worst possible thing for me.  First the cricket world cup consumed my weekends and killed my writing.  Now it's the rugby world cup and as a die-hard Springbok supporter I find it of the utmost importance to my sanity and psyche to compulsively read every bit of news about the Springboks and their world cup bid written in every blog and newspaper around the world.  Weekends are taken up with rugby-watching and it's very hard to focus on anything else.  Even planning an October getaway and December holiday has been pushed aside.  I have a one-track mind and it's not about sex.  Rugby, that's all I can think about at present.  I try and avoid conversations with people as I instinctively try and turn the conversations around to rugby and the Springboks chances in this world cup.  This is sad.

I have two books I should be working on.  Redesigning yourself for the multi-tasking generation which I'm co-writing with Jeremy Sherr, and C U @ 8, a novel I'm quite excited about.  I've promised myself that after the world cup, these books will get my full attention.  But there's always something else, isn't there?

Marketing.  The bain of my life.  Indie authors have to spend a lot of time marketing, especially if you want to enjoy the successes which come with increased sales.  Marketing is time-consuming, and at the moment is compartmentalised with watching E!  I can do both at the same time.  However, I do not spend nearly enough time on marketing.

Parenting takes time if you are a single-parent.  Your children expect you to talk and interact with them, fetch and carry them, all of which makes inroads on your time.  And if you just agree with them or pretend to listen, they have this nasty habit of taking your inattention personally, and throwing it back at you when you need their support.

And last of all is my job.  A huge distraction as I have to go to work during the week.  Because you receive a salary, the expectation is that you'll put in the hours and do the work.  Unfortunately, I do love my job so feel this compulsion to do the extra yards and go the extra mile.  If only I had a horrible job and didn't have to work.  Now if I could just make the time for marketing, to get the sales to supplement my income, then maybe...?  With one more child to go to university and finish school, retiring to write is not an option for a good few years.

My goal for this week is to manage my time and make the time to write.  It's what I'm passionate about (besides the rugby) so it stands to reason that I should make the time to follow my passion.

Have a good week.

Cindy

Wonderful Watamu

The worst part of a holiday is that it ends.  I think I could easily live the rest of my life on holiday.  Unfortunately, commitments like children mean I have to keep working.  But I can dream.  How wonderful it would be to have enough money to be permanently on holiday.

Watamu was wonderful!  Kenya is a great destination.  It's about an hour and a half north of Mombasa depending on how fast you drive, and about half an hour south of Malindi, along the fabulous Kenyan coast.
We stayed at Turtle Bay Beach Club, all inclusive - all meals, drinks, snacks, etc, etc for approx $150 a night for the two of us.  It was a bit less, but it's too early in the morning for my head to attempt conversion sums.  That includes the use of their hobie catamarans, kit surfers etc.  Siobhan even went scuba diving in the open sea and is now hooked.  She swam with two stingrays.  Seeing that she now wants to get a diving certificate, I guess that being permanently on holiday is not an option and I'll just have to keep working so I can keep paying.

Being addicted to history (I wonder if there's a 12-step program for it) I was keen to explore the Gede ruins about ten minutes drive from Turtle Bay.  Interesting, seriously.  The city state was abandoned when a drought caused wells to dry up, and people to die of disease in the 17th Century.  It must have been magnificent in its day.  Apparently, the people of Gede were peace-loving and refused to take sides when the Sultan of Mombasa was having a go at the Sultan of Malindi and they got caught in the middle.  Another reason why the city was abandoned.
After that little taste of history, I was determined to continue following the Portuguese around the world, having already been to Angola, Mossel Bay, Mozambique, Goa, China and Malaysia.  While Siobhan was diving on the coral reef, I headed north to Malindi which was where Vasca da Gama had stopped just before he visited Goa in India for the first time.  I checked out the cross he put up in 1498 and the chapel he built the same year.  A tiny limestone and thatch building, but the first church in East and Central Africa.  Very cool.
Much to Siobhan's (and probably mine) chagrin we had to leave Watamu, vowing to return whenever we could. 

We stopped off at Saltlick again on our way back after taking a shortcut through the back of beyond on some hair-raising dirt roads.  This time we saw the most amazing sight, a herd of over 40 elephants, many tiny calves that were still small enough to walk underneath their mother's bellies, descend on the watering hole.  Siobhan took the most stunning photographs, and I told her she might need ton re-think studying drama and rather focus on photography.  I made the silly mistake after being so caught up viewing her great shots, that I stupidly promised her a fantastic camera for her sixteenth birthday in September.  I guess that means I have to add a few more years onto my working life before I can retire to a cottage next to the sea. 
You can see the rest of the Watamu photos here

http://www.facebook.com/media/set/fbx/set=a.10150554707695444.652623.795715443&l=c21a70f257

Back at school now and this hectic term has started off to be just that.  I'm not sure how I'm going to manage to fit in some writing time, but will just have to give it a go.  I have two book projects on the go at the moment - How to say no to sex for the suddenly single, and Redesigning yourself for the multi-tasking generation.  And then of course Kerri and I stumbled upon this great idea for a novel when I wanted to advertise her skills on Facebook so that she can get a good and decent man. 

I wish I had more time for my writing.  I need that cottage by the sea so I can watch the waves from my window while I write up a storm.  Sigh.  My book sales for March and April have been sensational, hope it keeps up.  Okay, enough about wonderful Watamu.  I might just jump in my car and head back out there when I should be WRITING!

Have a great week!
Cindy

Defective - The book trailer

Relaxing and recuperating

It's amazing how you can get used to pain.  This has now been over two weeks of constant pain, and all I can think about are the poor people who experience constant pain on a daily basis year in and year out.  Pain is wearying and slows you down.  I don't know how those poor people do it.  It can definitely get you down, that's for sure.  But, I am still determined not to take painkillers and just let my body do its thing by itself.  My last mastectomy I remember being completely zonked out on painkillers and I took so long to recover and eventually ended up being sent off for respite care and being treated for post-traumatic stress disorder.  So this time I'm leaving it up to my mind and my body, and throwing away the drugs.  Hopefully, this little experiment will work.
At least it gives me a clear mind to work on my different book projects!  I wouldn't be able to do that if I was zonked out on drugs!


The backyard at the Hermanus house at dusk.

 After the U2 concert, I decided I needed to retreat to a quiet place to let my mind and body do their work.  Although I love my Mom to death, she is a little manic, racing here and there and when you stay with her you get caught up in her jetstream.  I swear she has more energy and life in her than someone in their twenties.  It can be exhausting being around her.  So as my folks were staying in their Cape Town flat while my Mom organised the redecorating and renovating of my sister's house, their beautiful house in Hermanus was unoccupied.  Kerri, my eldest daughter, and I decided to flee there and just relax.
The good thing, is when the pain gets too much or I get tired, I can lie on the couch and just read a book or watch TV.  I don't have to rush off anywhere at any particular time.  I haven't been able to do this for a very long time.  There are always things that need to be done and deadlines which have to be met.  Life can be hectic.

View from the lounge in the morning.

Despite all the relaxing I have managed to get a lot of work done.  I've completed the first draft of my novel Defective; completed the research for How to say NO to sex and other survival tips for the suddenly single; and worked on the Diet chapter of Redesigning Yourself for the Multitasking Generation, the book I'm writing with the esteemed and reknowned homeopath, Jeremy Sherr.  The good thing, is I can just work on them throughout the day when I feel like it.  I wish everyday of my life could be like this and I can work full-time on my books.  However, with a child still at school and a son at Hotel School I have to keep on working.
Kerri and I leave Hermanus on Thursday, and head back to Cape Town.  I plan on taking Tony and his girlfriend to watch the Stormers play rugby at Newlands on Saturday.  Kerri is not interested in seeing buffed men run around in tight shorts.  Poor girl doesn't know what she's missing!  Then a week of spending time visiting family and friends in Cape Town and then heading back to Tanzania.  So in effect I have four more days to get as much work done on these books as possible.  So what am I updating this blog for?  Got to go!
love
Cindy